Greetings, Jam fans and Scrantonicity connoisseurs! M. Giant couldn't be here tonight -- I suspect he's on his yearly pilgrimage to Scranton, but you didn't hear it from me. Either way, I'll try to dial down my adoration for the show and deem any squeals of "I love you, Jim!" and/or experimental beet recipes purely extracurricular. Just the facts, kids, I swear.

Jim and Pam chat on the phone. He asks if she wants to say hi to everyone, and she says no because she's mad that no one has congratulated her on the engagement. Jim reveals he didn't tell anyone yet because he didn't want to deal with their shenanigans. She claims it won't be that bad, so he engages speakerphone and puts her theory to the test.

Aaaaand... cue the reactions (paraphrased, of course) -- Oscar: You're not already engaged?; Angela: She used to be engaged to Roy, that harlot; Kevin: Do I have to get another gift?; Andy: Don't steal my thunder, Tuna; Dwight: You're marrying a loose woman! Then Michael walks in and asks what's going on. Pam tries to deflect, thus avoiding any inevitable Michael weirdness, but Creed announces, "The tall guy got engaged." Obviously a worshipper at the altar of Sarah "I Don't Blink" Palin, Michael immediately tackles Jim. Pam speakerphones, "Sorry." Credits.

Continue reading this entry on Television Without Pity.