Greetings, Jam fans and Scrantonicity connoisseurs! M. Giant couldn't be here tonight -- I suspect he's on his yearly pilgrimage to Scranton, but you didn't hear it from me. Either way, I'll try to dial down my adoration for the show and deem any squeals of "I love you, Jim!" and/or experimental beet recipes purely extracurricular. Just the facts, kids, I swear.

Jim and Pam chat on the phone. He asks if she wants to say hi to everyone, and she says no because she's mad that no one has congratulated her on the engagement. Jim reveals he didn't tell anyone yet because he didn't want to deal with their shenanigans. She claims it won't be that bad, so he engages speakerphone and puts her theory to the test.

Aaaaand... cue the reactions (paraphrased, of course) -- Oscar: You're not already engaged?; Angela: She used to be engaged to Roy, that harlot; Kevin: Do I have to get another gift?; Andy: Don't steal my thunder, Tuna; Dwight: You're marrying a loose woman! Then Michael walks in and asks what's going on. Pam tries to deflect, thus avoiding any inevitable Michael weirdness, but Creed announces, "The tall guy got engaged." Obviously a worshipper at the altar of Sarah "I Don't Blink" Palin, Michael immediately tackles Jim. Pam speakerphones, "Sorry." Credits.

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Aaand, we're back. No teaser this week, just right into the familiar main titles, complete with Krasinski-shot Scranton B-roll. Once that's over, we get a title card that reads "Week 1 -- June 30." The conference room is the scene of a huge banquet containing all the most fattening foods you can imagine, up to and including a custard fountain. Michael talking-heads that Corporate is sponsoring a weight-loss contest, and the branch that loses the most weight wins three extra vacation days. Back in the conference room, Dwight puts a conclusive end to talk about leftovers -- and the banquet itself -- by spraying everything with Raid.

Everyone then heads down the warehouse for the official weigh-in. "Don't go breakin' my scale," Darryl warns. They couldn't if they tried. Andy THs that he wants to have washboard abs for the first time Angela sees him naked. Dwight offers everyone one last bite of éclair. "Hold it in your mouth, don't swallow." Jim smirks like he's the 12-year-old he is, because you know that's what she said. But Michael lets it go by, because he's standing right next to Holly and thus behaving himself. Darryl announces the collective starting weight: 2,336 pounds. Pam gets kicked off, because she won't be there next week, and she's already looking a little sad about her upcoming departure as the new weight turns out to be 2,210 pounds. There's a long pause while everyone does some math in their heads. Naturally, the chronically tact-challenged -- and math-challenged -- Kevin is the first to speak: "You weigh 226 pounds!" Pam is torn between wanting to set the record straight and just moving on. "Math is hard," Holly tells Kevin supportively. [Isn't Kevin an accountant? I know he's dim, but I thought he was at least good with numbers. - Zach]

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The Office's Angela Kinsey has a bun in the oven and not just from overeating yesterday on Thanksgiving.

Angela and her TV writer hubby Warren Lieberstein are expecting their first child this May and are said to be "very excited."

I wonder how this will factor into the show. Will the daddy be Dwight Shrute or Insufferable Cornell grad, Andy? This could be really good!

Congrats to the happy couple!

Calling all you Office fans. If you love Steve Carell make sure you tune into tonight's The Office marathon to get the first glimpse of the trailer for this summer's Evan Almighty.

"Steve Carell, reprising his role as the polished, preening newscaster Evan Baxter of Bruce Almighty, is the next one anointed by God to accomplish a holy mission... Newly elected to Congress, Evan leaves Buffalo behind and shepherds his family to suburban northern Virginia. Once there, his life gets turned upside-down when God (Morgan Freeman) appears and mysteriously commands him to build an ark."

I'm scared to watch the trailer because I know I'm going to love it so much but then I will have to wait to see it. I have no patience. I wish I had a time machine to take me to this movie's opening day.

I love it when actors and actresses need to prove to the world that they're more versatile and not at all like the characters they play in TV and movies.

Case in point: Jenna Fisher who plays nice girl receptionist Pam in The Office. On that show she is sweet and lovable, but check out the cover of April's Wired Magazine and you'll see a side of Pam you've never seen before. In fact you'll see all sides of Pam cause she's naked!

Don't worry, it's tastefully done... well as tasteful as wearing a post-it bra can possibly be.

When NBC made episodes of The Office available on itunes last year, the show really took off. Ripping a page from that playbook, they have decided to release an exclusive extended episode of The Office on NBC.com Thursday night.

NBC is calling it a "producer’s cut," which is just a longer version of the show you will see Thursday night but with more content including extra scenes. I have to imagine there is so much funny in The Office that gets cut every week because the show is just hilarious that it will be really interesting to see what they cut out. You can check it out on NBC.com immediately after the show airs.

Well, the long wait is over. Tonight we will finally find out what happened after the Pam/Jim kiss that blew the mind of every Office fan during last season's finale. Seriously, it was one of the best episodes of television I saw last year. I've been thinking a lot about what might happen this season. At the very least, I think Pam put off her wedding with Roy. They may still be together, but Pam has to be trying to figure out what to do with Jim. And if she did cancel the wedding I definitely think her colleagues, who probably went out and bought gifts and dresses for the wedding, would be pissed and continue to remind her about it. Also is Jim going to relocate? And when we last saw Michael, for some unknown reason, he had two ladies chasing after him, I know, insane right? There must be slim pickings in the men's department in Scranton, PA. So tune in to tonights premiere episode because I have a feeling it's going to be a good one and you're not going to want to miss it.

Did you miss the best kiss of last season? Well if you did, you have a second chance at seeing Jim smooching Pam tonight on NBC before the new season of The Office premieres next week. That kiss was easily one of my top five favorite season finale moments of last year. And I think Pam liked it too.

If the anticipation is killing you and you just can't wait to find out what happens this season on The Office, maybe you could ask Steve Carrell for any spoilers. You never know, maybe he'll give some up. Crazier things have happened...